Well, there you go. The first trailer for the new Spider-Man movie has gone live. I'm not too impressed by it, even though I love Spider-Man. Though, personally, I hardly ever read the comics. Maybe... twice. I've played the games, watched the cartoons, and saw the first three movies with Toby McGuire. Also, the toys. So many toys when I was a kid.
Now, back to the preview. Hmm... well, there is more focus on his past. The whole Parker-parents thing doesn't seem very suitable for the origin story. Although, I guess it will be necessary for him to develop his web fluid. The fluid is based off a scientific design Parker is able to complete after he gets his spider-powers. Probably because spiders have a natural instinct for creating their own web. Though, the more you think about it, the less sense it makes.
Then Gwen Stacy. Hot. Approved.
Then comes the parkour thing. It looks a lot like the Mirror's Edge game. The special effects producer must have played it recently with his kids.
The Peter Parker character seems a bit too cliche'- nerdy, though maybe he is where the cliche' comes from. Bla bla bla. I need more beer. Peace.
Short version of the review: I recommend it. Long version of the review: Below.
If you saw Ironman 1&2 and Thor, I would recommend you see this. If you plan on seeing the Avengers film next year, you have no goddamn reason to skip this movie. Otherwise you are missing the point itself. In fact, a piece of the major plot revolves around the very-shiny-and-mysterious cuboid seen in the post-credits scene of Thor.
Yeah, that thing. The Cosmic Cube. Have they flat-out said what this thing can do? I don't think the Captain America movie even knew what it was all about.
Now, time to prod this movie with a mocking stick. Also, look out for some spoilers below. I won't be descrete about this. The movie starts with Steve Rogers doing his thing; trying to fight for his US of the America. Some character exposition happens, some more things, and then we are introduced to his best-friend-and-eventually-sidekickish friend Bucky. Sorry girls, he doesn't wear a domino mask in this movie and he isn't 14. More character exposition happens, bla bla bla, just sit back and enjoy.
Then comes the super soldier treatment. In every commercial I have seen for this movie up until it's opening, we see Rogers actually grow inside the giant metal taning bed, which was a really nice touch. It showed progression into the man he would become. Instead, we get blinding light and then he steps out all big-blonge-and-beautiful. Mm.
Small thing that bothered me: they said that they were going to apply some serum to all of his major muscle groups. Then they only apply it to his biceps. Why didn't he walk out looking like a Tank from Left 4 Dead? A major hulk above the waist, and a tiny scarecrow of a man below.
After all of this, other things happen. A nice chase scene with only one car involved, Nazi submarines and more. The good stuff. A little humor in there too; which I love. There was a nice little bit where Rogers was chasing down a car using his Adonis-body-from-five-minutes-ago, and he is so unfamiliar with his new form he accidentally turns too hard and crashes into a building. Brilliant.
Bla bla bla. More stuff happens. Captain America gets three costumes in this movie, all of which are either ridiculously hilarious or down-right badass. Though, to be fair, the second is really a composite of the first and some stolen military gear.
Then some shields happen, and the rest of the movie spends 40% of the screen time with that damn thing in the screen.
Then he gets a badass motorcycle that does some tricky-awesome things straight out of Twisted Metal.
Damn, I need to wrap this up. Uh.
Hydra was awesome. Instead of just being a straight parallel to the Nazi army, they are the super devious research and development branch of the Nazi regime that eventually spirals out of control. Their weapons are devastating and everything has a nice blue neon trim. Though their salute is downright humorous.
Then Captain America and his rag-tag group of mercinary-soldiers of fortune crash the party and look damn good doing it. However, this is all in montage. I guess the videogames can pick up that slack, but damn, I would have loved to see them crush even more Nazi heads.
Also more shield.
Then more character development, some credits roll, and you see pure Marvel magik.
I misspelled that correctly, yes.
Here is my theory for why everyone loves this: Steve Rogers represents the typical, under-physically-developed fan who wishes they were as big and strong as their favorite heroes. Instead of going to the gym and working up to that stature, Rogers gets it within a span of five minutes. Who wouldn't want that? What a slacker.
Here is a link to my quick and thorough review of the movie on youtube.
Though it may seem like I'm a one-topic pony, this is actually a nice segway into my next post.
Remember when I discussed my love for the Dr. McNinja web comics?
Well it seems that my love for ninja-themed web action is getting eloped with my love of Marvel mercenary comics.
As a normal person would say, Chris Hastings of Dr. McNinja is going to write a story for Marvel's Deadpool!
It has to do with hammers. Get it? Hammer time. Yeah.
Personally, I can't wait. I'm ecstatic. Giddy. Hastings is an amazing writer, and perfectly captures the inexplainable mindset of these comics. The deranged humor, the impossible-yet-plausible plotline for stories like these, and the clever-yet-imaginative violence. Hastings is a professional at writing all three.
I don't care if you don't like comics, I don't care if you don't like me, but please. I beg of you. Give these a try. Spend the measly four dollars and buy the first comic when it comes out. Make the industry proud. Even if the market is swamped with Deadpool stories. (Didn't they recently cancel one? This seems counter productive.)
In case you can't tell, I happen to be a big Deadpool fan.
Did I mention that I once dressed up as Deadpool for Halloween?
This was perhaps one of the most important choices of my video game career.
Not just in regards to my weird obsession with Pokémon as a child, but through my entire video game history. Probably because it was my first major decision in my first major game.
Bulbasaur, Squirtle or Charmander?
The Pokémon I picked decided the entirety of how I played the game, though I didn't know it at the time.
It decided how I would play the first few hours of the game; grinding to fight Brock or breezing through him. It decided the makeup of my team; I would never need another fire, water or grass type if I wanted decent coverage.
Since I had a brother who also played these games, my decision how I would play in contrast to him. We didn't want the same starter, so we had to come to some sort of agreement; when you're 10 that boils down to yelling and biting.
This was so monumental because Pokémon was my first videogame that I played seriously. "How do you want to spend the next umpteenth hours in this game? We won't tell you anything about these little guys. Pick wisely." Part of the nostalgic magic of these games come from that thrill of your first serious, honest choice as a gamer. Never again will you get that first experience.
So who do you choose?
Squirtle.
Squirtle forever.
(Also, if you find the original source of this art please tell me. I would like to accredit the artist.)
